Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events

hmm.. went 4 dis show after work 2day with weilin. d movie 1st started off with quite a dark feel.. but it was still veered towards a happy ending so yeah. not bad. pretty amusing n all.. really loved d youngest kiddo girl called sunny. she's d coolest! d other 2 older kids cld act pretty well.. but jim carrey was quite an overkill. saw 2 much of him. or maybe i was juz biased cuz he was such a good bad guy. haha.. pun intended.

so here i am. somewhere else again. n it was juz as well cuz i met my fren online n she said somethin 2 me which i thot was quite scary. d whole chunk was embedded with many inner meanings which i haven't yet figured out. oh well. wadeva.

anyway wad i really wanted 2 type out were my feelings n thots as i was walking out of ny after alumni training on sat. not much of training really, mostly playing full court with d juniors.. tt was all. as i was abt 2 leave after i put in my last shot, of course i walked over 2 jiaolian n said my gd bye. den she said d same thing she has been tellin me all these years ever since i incurred my knee injury d 1st time. 'u're a smart player. n u play well. if not for ur knee u cld haf been in d national team.' she always says tt. national team??!! n as good as it may sound, i actually hated it. i haf always wondered, is she giving me more credit den i deserve? or does she really think tt highly of me? i dunno. for wad it's worth, it cld be like wad she said or it cld not. either way my deepest regret is NOT having d chance 2 prove it. n i will never hav it again. ever. shit.

dis is like d worst thing tt ever happened to me. nothin i haf experienced was even half as bad as dis. failed friendships bad results lousy kinships emotional void blah blah blah. nothin even came close. as i was walking alongside d ny compound d scene of how i got injured replayed itself in my mind.. again n again. n angry tears juz trickled down. sometimes i still lament at God. why He let this happen 2 me. n why me. since tt fateful day bball has nv been d same again. nv managed 2 do wad i wanted. always hindered by dis lousy glitch in me. freaking lousy me. i cld jus lash out at all d world n feel no consolation whatsoever. cuz dere's no one who cld restore me 2 myself. wad cld i do. wadeva. nothin else really matters anymore actually. if only i cld haf had tt one chance. to prove to myself wad i can really do. juz once. i can't look upon others now n not feel a thing. something always wells up in me. maybe it's plain disappointment. i juz feel so.. wad's d word.. inadequate. but i dun blame God. i mean.. how cld anyone blame Him rite?? sigh.. i juz noe i'm gonna regret wad i said here. aarrgghh.. SHIT!!