thoughts

i promised myself juz some time ago for a dear fren's sake (who doesn't noe) that i wldn't drink unnecessarily. well.. i juz had some, quite unnecessarily, n feeling really woozy. can hear my heartbeat in my head increasing in such decibels. it wasn't to drown sorrows or anything lidat though. this time a certain other fren is doing that, i'm juz here to keep her company.

n now, as i read jinx's blog's last entry, my tears started to pour. i always knew she played the piano beautifully n was really talented at it. either she juz nv realised it or the pple ard who have heard her play didn't give her half the credit she always deserved. perhaps she nv saw herself the way i always did. u see.. i'm happy for her. truly. and am glad she still keeps me in her list of pple whom she asks God to bless n keep. i wish her every happiness life can bring. and wish her true inner joy for being herself, that she embraces everything that comes along in life. perhaps things may not go back to the way they used to be. i juz wan to always be ard when she needs someone.

zero

expectations always bring disappointments. almost without fail..

darn.. i juz dun get it do i?!
no more expectations from me. period.

ghost of yOu aNd me

it's weird how some things have passed for 2 years n yet still surfaces in ur mind when u least expect it.

took me quite by surprise this time.

dunno why it still haunts me.

i swear i've gotten over it.

well.. perhaps not quite..

gum gum bubblegum

lalalala.. hey u.. (yes u!!) u noe who or wad i mean by the title rite? haha.. anyway i got this today: "always seek first to understand rather than be understood.." wow.. it's almost like an answer man. hmm.. i wonder...? could it be....? oh well..

so i nv actually thought abt it concretely b4 but this certain someone who quoted the above has indeed taught me many things since the day our paths crossed. it didn't really occur to me much till i heard myself saying these words to others. sometimes i think God really does work in miraculous ways so beyond our limited minds' comprehension. thank you.

took leave off from work tmr. though this day has been approved like more than a mth ago, i realised juz yest that it turned out it was quite a bad day to be on leave. kinda like a day where many things were happening n needed to be done. plus 2 new admin staff will be coming. sigh.. alritey.. full steam ahead from friday onwards.. dear Father, please grant me the strength n wisdom for me to always exercise integrity n excellent character in all that i do. amen.