'They walk out on you.' - My Fat Brother

'Do you remember on your last visit you said that you sometimes felt hurt because people walked out on you?'
Did I? Jesus. This is like seeing a home-video of a drunken evening and finding out what a prat you made out of yourself.
'And you said you didn't need anyone?'
I nod. I vaguely recall something along those lines.
'Do you think you might have got into the habit of pushing people away to protect yourself?'
Hmmm. Protect myself. Of course I protect myself, it's the number-one thing we're taught as kids. Watch out! Be careful! Don't slip! Take that breadknife out of your mouth! We have to protect ourselves. Because people are careless, they're selfish, they lie to you, they don't come to your book launch. They walk out on you.
'Yeah. Maybe I do that,' I reply succinctly.
'So you want people to be loyal to you, not to walk away from you, and yet part of you wants to push them away to protect yourself?'
'That's a bit of a Catch-22, isn't it?' I admit.
'It could be a problem.' Lindsey smiles.
I wonder, then and there, if Mum is right about shrinks. They put idea into people's heads that were never there in the first place. I wonder whether I could tell her that I'm seeing a therapist.
Perhaps not.
'So what's the answer?' I ask, sounding like a child in a classroom.
'I don't know. But I think we're getting somewhere. I want you to think about all this, and we'll talk more next week,' says Lindsey, glancing at her watch.
'Think? Of course I'll bloody think! I can't stop thinking, you stupid bloody cow!' Actually, I don't say this. Instead I thank her, pay her, and make a dash for the exit.